161. And Here...We...Go!

Yeah, EPL weekend kicks off here and now. The Arse are up 1 nil against next year's Championship title contenders. So far nothing displayed indicates that they'll win the EPL. Same old Arse...slick, sexy...and ultimately lightweight and callow. In Nasri they have a gem to replace Hleb, but only just.

In the Olympics, an Italy team powered by Italy's future no. 10, Sebastian Giovinco, didn't have enough fire power to overcome Belgium. Disappointing, but hopefully, the young lad will go on to have an amazing season with the Old Lady and prove himself to be the top class player everyone in Italy craves him to be.

And Phelps, jeez, superhuman that fella. A mutant. A freak of nature. Watching him swim gives that same sort of mixture of awe and dread as watching the Chinese weightlifters lift and the Chinese divers dive. They're all not of this world.

Elsewhere, the Dark Knight continues to dominate. Can it do so for a fifth week in a row? In the face of challenge from both Stiller's new brilliant gem and Lucas' pile of shit. The Neckless One has truly raped everyone's childhood once and for all. Bastard.