102. Choice

Anyway, I had a both wonderful and disturbing thought the other day. It was about choice, how we all have it, and how we sometimes conveniently forget that we have it to justify certain things.

If you are unhappy at your current job, and incessantly bitch and whine about it, for the love of God, do us all a favour and quit and land a gig that's right for you. There's no point you polluting our space with your shit. Get with it. You're in your current profession by choice. No one is forcing you. You think you got problems? How bout those poor women forced into prostitution? Get some fucking perspective man.

If you find yourself stuck in a rut, don't just fucking complain to anyone you meet on the street. It's just not on. I hardly know you, have some self-respect. You're not on fucking American Idol here right. You bitch about not having meaning to your life, yadda, yadda, yadda. Well fuck you man. You know why your life is meaningless? It's because you're a fucking pathetic retard who can't think or fend for yourself and rely on the sympathy and good will of others to get by. Shape up or just end it already.

If you want to lose some weight but can't because you're too lazy to get your fat ass to the gym, don't bloody complain to me how you're putting on weight every single freaking time I see you. Yeah of course you're putting on weight. Who gives a shit? You could be a hippo squeezed in a ballerina's tutu for all I care. Keep that in mind the next time you whine to me like a little girl. And when was the last time you had a neck, you douchebag?

And for crying out loud, if you're complaining about a chick who ran off with 20 grand of your hard-earned cash because you were stupid enough to loan it to her even though you've only known her for a few weeks, well what I can say? You deserve to fucking die a slow and miserable death you do. In fact, they shouldn't even let you die, but ensure you live as long as humanly possible so that they can inflict as much pain as possible to your sorry ass.

But actually, what if we really didn't have any choice? What if it were just an illusion. What that does define us, already pre-determines the choices we make. It's who we are, how we are built. People don't change, and they keep making the same choices again and again.

It's like how I knew that some friends would make the predictable choices when confronted with critical decisions. You could advise them all you want, but they've already made their choice. And perhaps it's probably the same for all of us. There are people who will always tend to choose the easier but perhaps murky path rather than the harder but lawful one. There are people who will always tend to choose to stand up and be counted rather than fade into obscurity in the background. And of course, there are people who will always tend to choose to pee without raising the bloody toilet seat up and leaving a pleasant surprise for that special someone who uses the loo next.

So, maybe we shouldn't pretend at all on how this thing is all gonna end. We can already gauge it by the predictable choices we'll make throughout this wonderful life of ours. And with that, we'll already know our destination. But I guess the most important thing is, that at the end of day, no matter how much you may moan and gripe, when the curtain falls, and our light is extinguished, we know that we can leave knowing that this is the ending that we wanted.

Our choices brought us there, and it was the choices we made that defined us. Be it if you die a pauper or a rich man, a grandfather or a lonely pervert, a monk or a pimp. Don't look back and ever think you could've been something else or something more. A poor fisherman who's wanted nothing more but to fish and mend nets will definitely be happier than a rich and successful politician who wished he made the right choices for once in his life and had a clear conscience.

So, what are you waiting for?

And a Happy Chinese New Year to all. I choose not to indulge in the festivities this year because it gets quite tiresome sometimes. But I make the choice to still accept ang pows. Don't worry, I know where to find you. And Happy Valentine's too for those who dig it.